LEARNING TO TRUST

            Learning to trust in our own basic goodness, sanity, and unconditional confidence is part of the training to be a warrior of the heart.  Millions of others are also training to awaken their courage to face and not run from life’s challenges, to respond without going into our habitual patterns.  Yet we are also the only one who knows the internal dialogue that begins to judge our situation, and gets distracted by the monkey mind, the critical mind, the mind that wants certainty in a reality where change and impermanence are more true.  So we pick ourselves up, and do our best while also being tender with ourselves.

            It was special to join Keziah’s party during the rain squall last night.  She has a core resilience and tranquility about her even midst the extreme challenges of her new life after her stroke.  In her quiet way, she reminded me I can walk; too often I take it for granted that I can get out of bed on my own, and despite pain when I overdo it, yes, I can walk.   My mobility is amazing compared to 15 years ago, when my life felt on the brink, and fear was more my reality than faith.  Then just getting from my bedroom to the kitchen was frightening.  Now I am leaving on a trip to a cabin on  the Chetco River in two days, it’s rainy and cool outside on June 19, but I trust with help I will be packed and ready to go in time.  It will be a lovely trip, with time for adventure, reflection, laughter, rest, and camaraderie.  I still love to travel!

             Life is a miracle.  It pays to notice the blessings along the way.  The more we can lean into the present, savor and appreciate it, the more joyful we are to be alive on this planet, even in this time of enormous changes.  When we make choices with courage, tenacity, perseverance, and a sense of wonder, we may be able to help others more than we realize.  Learning to trust, letting go our obsessions and worries, frees us to focus on what matters.  May each day be one of new beginnings!